Temptation was all around and Jeff was starting to break. Thoughts racing as his pulse quickened, he closed his eyes. For what felt like an eternity, he tried, desperately, to be that pillar of serenity…
Seconds become hours but soon Jeff was nonetheless transported into a state of enlightenment. Like a newborn experiencing the world for the first time, Jeff was quiet and calm. Around him, waves crashed, wind blew, women smiled and he was gone. A smile crept—
“Dude wake up!” whispered Katie, his friend sitting next to him. Instantly awake and alarmed, Jeff snapped out of his moment of zen. Like the crack of a gun, he was fully startled. Daring to take a quick snapshot of the room, Jeff noticed that nothing had changed.
The professor was still waxing poetic about the state of the nation while all the students, save for Jeff, sat quietly behind laptops. Stealing a glance at Katie’s screen, he saw the headline “13 Signs You’re Addicted to Instagram” and he longed to scroll down that sweet Buzzfeed article. And then another. And another.
Temptation grew. Looking back at his own desk, which was properly arranged with a slightly askew notebook and two Bic pens, Jeff started to panic. Again. Double-checking his backpack, he was dismayed to find empty space. The time crunch of the morning had caused him to forget his Mac and now he was alone in a room full of people.
A quick aha moment quickly soured as Jeff pulled out his iPhone 5 only to rediscover what he had tried to forget, the battery was at zero. Eyes full of desperation, he leaned over to Katie. “Psssst. Katie, can I use your phone charger? My phone is dead.”
Her wicked smile vanished before it full developed as she looked him dead in the eye and said the worst thing in the world. “Come on Jeff. I swear you ask me this everyday. My iPhone 4 charger doesn’t fit into your phone. Stop asking already!”Jeff started to break out into full sweat.
Looking, hopefully, at the clock on the wall and realizing that there was over an hour of class remaining, full panic set in. All he needed was a quick fix. Just some of that sweet electronic elixir to take the edge off. What if North Korea had shot that missile? Or his apartment was on fire? Or worse, what if he had an unread text or Facebook comment?
His thougts began to race even quicker than before. How could concentrate on the professor, or anything, if he couldn’t tap in. Unlike Neo, Jeff didn’t want to be unplugged. He couldn’t be unplugged. Feeling the back of his head, Jeff found nothing. Game over.
Edvard Munch couldn’t have captured the scream that was beginning in Jeff’s throat. He felt it coming but he couldn’t stop it. Like the sound of 20,000 locomotives meets the man in black‘s roar in The Princess Bride, Jeff emitted an unmatchable (alarm) noise that (Alarm) only an (ALARM) could stop (ALARM!!!!!)…
Jeff woke up to the noise of his iPhone alarm wailing away. Noticing the fully charged battery, he smiled.
